Today’s post is about how no matter what the discussion or how serious the tasks at hand, in Iraqi culture, you just can’t take everything seriously. After witnessing this about 4 or 5 times a week for the last month, I’ve decided that it was finally time to share this with you, the reader.
Most of the meetings I am privy to involve a gathering of all kinds of Iraqi leaders. This is everyone from Federal Officials to Police Officers to Sheikhs (Religious/Tribal elders if you will) and their respective Council members. The meetings tend to have a common theme. Everyone greets each other and conducts a series of small talk type conversations to start off with. Next, a dude walks in with a single cup of some of the most potent tasting coffee you will ever try. One person drinks from the cup and then the cup is refilled and passed to the next person in the room. After 30 locals who rarely brush their teeth have had a go, then if you’re lucky, you’ll get your chance. And Allah help you if you forget to shake the cup when you hand it back because if you don’t the coffee guy will continue to re-pour you cup after cup until you vomit or he runs out of coffee. When in doubt, shake the cup.
After about 10 minutes of pass the gingivitis it’s time for round two, the Chai. “Chai” is Arabic for tea. Tea is a big deal in Iraq and anytime you are a guest somewhere you can be sure that someone will offer you tea. Now, the tea is a little more enjoyable because it’s sweet and everyone in the room gets their own cup which is always a plus. Soldiers always have quite a bit to say about the Chai so I am not going to dive too much into it today. It’s probably better left for a post entirely devoted to Chai.
The real reason we are here is to discuss round 3; the juice box. After the tea most of the people in the meeting realize it’s probably time for a nice cold drink. The most common refreshment being offered at these meetings, aside from water, is juice boxes. This may seem a little odd at first, but you have to realize that an assortment of juice boxes is a great way to give people a healthy alternative to soda while still providing them with the variety they deserve.
Picture this…A Federal Police Officer preaching to a room of religious elders and council members about serious issues such as security concerns and potential terrorist threats. Hands are thrown up in the air, fists are slammed down on the table!....and after all of that the next thing you see is that same, very serious, and very livid man…..sipping from his juice box. How can you not laugh at that!?
Imagine any kind of overly dramatic movie involving an important world leader…Could you imagine Hitler in the movie Downfall telling his commanders that Berlin will be held at all costs! And then slowly putting a straw up to his lips to sip some banana juice? Or, George Bush on the USS Abraham Lincoln announcing that all combat operations in Iraq were over, and then chugging away at his sugar free apple juice? Okay, maybe that last one could actually happen. But, you get my point.
Sometimes it’s hard not to smile, no matter how serious the issue.
-The Quarterback
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